The Spiritual Discipline of Confession

We say a great deal of things in church without really taking the time to understand what exactly it is that we are saying. For instance, we often say, almost instinctively, that Christians “believe in the forgiveness of sins.” But do we truly understand what it is that we are saying. To believe in the forgiveness of sins is not nearly as easy in practice. Real belief in forgiveness is the sort of thing that very easily slips away if we don’t keep on polishing it up. And a real belief in forgiveness is the very thing that can release us from years of shame and strengthen our faith.

This morning I am going to discuss the discipline of confession and how through Christ’s forgiveness we grow closer to God and more firm in our Christian walks.

At the heart of God is the desire to give and to forgive. He has made this abundantly clear to us through Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross. But how do we tap in to this forgiveness and use it both as a cleansing of our souls and as a strengthening of our relationship with God?

First, we must understand what exactly confession is.

Confession involves both a change in our relationship with God and a personal change in us. It is a means of healing and transforming our inner spirit. Repentance and confession are the white flags of surrender that we wave to declare the death of our pride and the submission of our will to God’s will. Awareness and conviction of sin is the beginning of real spirit-centered living. Confession is at the heart of an open, growing relationship with God – outward signs of our inward desire to know and love God more fully. Through confession, what is kept in darkness and has festered in secret is brought into the light and made visible, losing its power to shame and weaken us. Through forgiveness, the darkness is dispelled and healing flows both to the individual and within the community.

Practically, confession generally takes place in one of two ways. Either we pray directly to God, privately and quietly confessing our sins, and seeking his forgiveness OR we reveal our sins to a Christian friend and our friend forgives us of our sins in Christ’s name. Although we are all most likely more familiar and comfortable with private confession, it is important to realize that God has given all followers of Christ the authority to receive the confession of sin and to forgive it in his name. John 20:23 specifically says, “If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven.” It is this second type of confession that I would like to focus on today, confession made out loud to fellow Christians.

There is no doubt that most of us do and would feel more comfortable with private confession to God than with a more public confession to a fellow Christian, but we must not let our pride and insecurities interfere with our need for forgiveness and healing. There are some distinct advantages and freeing qualities to confessing our sins to a fellow Christian. Some people have had no problems knowing Christ’s forgiveness and have obtained a release from the persistent nagging habits of sin through private confession and these people should rejoice greatly in this evidence of God’s mercy. But there are others for whom this has not happened. We have prayed, even begged, for forgiveness, and though we hope we have been forgiven, we sense no release. The memories of our mistakes still haunt us and we cannot help but feel that our sins are a never ending obstacle between us and God. We feel that certain sins have permanently stained our Christian walk. For these people who cannot quiet their conscience through private confession, God has given us the church, all of us here today, our brothers and sisters in Christ, to stand with and make God’s presence and forgiveness real to us. It is through the voice of our brothers and sisters in Christ that the word of forgiveness is heard and takes root in our lives. Dietrich Bonhoeffer once wrote, “As long as I am by myself in the confession of my sins everything remains in the dark, but in the presence of a brother the sin has to be brought into the light.” There is a special and unique healing that accompanies the confession of our sins out loud to a fellow believer.

One of my first experiences with confession came through my upbringing in the Catholic Church. In the Catholic Church, anyone desiring to confess their sins enters into a private confessional with a priest, says a short prayer taking responsibility for their sins and confesses their sins out loud to the priest. At the conclusion of the confession, the priest says that your sins have been forgiven. I can still remember the release I used to feel when the priest would say, “You are forgiven.” There was nothing miraculous about the priest’s power, he was simply exercising an ability God has given to all believers. God wants us to use our fellow Christians as instruments for forgiveness.

Although, many of us would feel uncomfortable with the stylized and formalistic form of confession, it does have certain advantages and helps to illustrate some of the unique benefits of confession to a fellow Christian as opposed to private confession. We should strive to incorporate these elements into our confessions on a regular basis.

The first benefit of the formal confession is that the person confessing their sins is required to recite a printed confession which does not allow for any excuses or extenuating circumstances. We must confess that we have sinned by our own fault, our own misguided choice. Our sins cannot be called errors in judgment, nor is there any room to blame them on upbringing or family or mean neighbors. It is reality therapy of the best sort since we are so prone to blame our sins on everybody and everything instead of taking personal responsibility for them. It is absolutely essential that we take responsibility for our sins. Often times when we think that we are asking God to forgive us, we are often simply asking Him to do something quite different. We are asking God not to forgive us but to excuse us. Real confession means looking steadily at the sin, the sin that is left over without an excuse, after all allowances have been made, and seeing it in all its horror, dirt, meanness, and malice, and presenting it to God so that you may be released from it.

A second advantage to the formal confession is that after the confession has been completed the words of forgiveness are expected and given in the absolution. Once the person confessing their sins has finished, he is told in clear, authoritative words that he is totally forgiven and set free of his sin. When spoken by a brother or sister in Christ, these words take hold in a tangible and real manner. When we hear the confessions of others, we must be sure to state in a clear and authoritative tone that the sins are forgiven. Hearing these words and truly taking them to heart can have a profound affect and help us to understand that we are free from our sins, we are released from their constraining hold on us.

In order to fully utilize the cleansing power of confession, however, we must also have a proper view of our church community. Too often we view our churches as a fellowship of saints before we see them as a fellowship of sinners. We thus lead ourselves to believe that everyone else has advanced so far into holiness that we are isolated and alone in our sin. We cannot bear to reveal our failures and shortcomings to others. We imagine that we are the only ones who have not stepped onto the high road to heaven. Therefore, we hide ourselves from one another and live in veiled lies and hypocrisy.

But if we know that the people of God are first a fellowship of sinners, we are freed to hear the unconditional call of God’s love and to confess our needs openly before our brothers and sisters. In acts of mutual confession we release the power that heals. Our humanity is no longer denied, but transformed.

Once we have an accurate picture of our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, practically confession should take on three basic components: an examination of our conscience, sorrow, and a determination to avoid sin.

In order to confess our sins we must first examine our conscience in order to determine those things that we have done that need forgiveness. We open ourselves up in prayer and contemplation and invite God to reveal areas that need his healing touch. Often sins are not difficult to discover. In this experience of opening ourselves to the gaze of God we must be prepared to deal with definite sins. A generalized confession may save us from humiliation and shame, but it will not ignite inner healing. We must confess concrete and specific sins.

Sorrow is also a necessary element of a healing confession. Sorrow, however, is not simply an emotion, but a disgust at having committed the sin, a deep regret at having offended the heart of the Father. Sorrow is a way of taking the confession seriously. We must understand that our sin is not to be taken lightly, we have intentionally set obstacles between ourselves and God, and only by God’s grace and mercy are we forgiven.

Lastly, confession must be accompanied by a determination to avoid sin. We must ask God to give us a yearning for holy living, a hatred for unholy living. We must desire to be conquered and ruled by God, or if we do not desire it, to desire to desire it.

One last point that is very important is a practical matter. Whom should you go to in order to make a confession? It is true theologically to say that every Christian believer can receive the confession of another, BUT not every Christian will have sufficient empathy and understanding. Unfortunately, some people are incapable of keeping secrets, others may be horrified at the revealing of certain sins, and still others would shrug it off with a “that’s not that bad.” We must ask God to reveal people to us that understand and would be delighted to minister to us through hearing confession. These people are generally spiritually mature, wise, compassionate, have good common sense, the ability to keep a confidence, and a wholesome sense of humor. Not only should we seek these characteristics in a person to hear our confessions, but we should seek to possess these characteristics so that we may be welcoming to those that confess sins to us.

The discipline of confession brings an end to pretense. God is calling us to be a church that can openly confess its frail humanity and know the forgiving and empowering graces of Christ. Honesty leads to confession, and confession leads to change. Although the result of confession is not sinless perfection, it is an increasing ability, by the power of the Holy Spirit, to sin less and less as we grow into the heart of God.